After more than 40 years of smoking, I am now smoke free. I tried or half-tried to quit smoking a few times in my life but never with the strong commitment to make it work. When my 4 children were born the doctor never said much about smoking so I never thought pregnancy was a reason to stop.
My quit was not planned. I was sitting at the computer one morning and was about to put a cigarette out when I looked at the filter. I saw the black and right then decided that was my last smoke. I have no clue what made me determined this time as it was not the first black filter I have seen.
I immediately went to the store, bought nicotine patches, nicorette gum, candy and life savers. After 3 days the patches were giving me headaches so I stopped using them. After a few more days of chewing the nasty gum I thought what is the difference between this and a cigarette. I stocked up on life savers, tootsie pops, and hard candies. I have not waivered from my quit and it is now 7.5 months.
It has been strong determination and being so proud of myself I sparkle, that has kept me from lighting up. My family's joy has also kept me from lighting up. While I know they would forgive me if I smoked again, I do not want to let them down now that I have come so far. And the fact that each day I look at a wall plaque that one of my daughters made with my quit date and congratulations keeps me from lighting up.
This has not been easy and there are still days that I taste the smoke like I just lit up. I never thought I could do this after so many years but I did and I beam from ear to ear. I feel wonderful. I walk about 3-5 miles daily. I did put on about 20 pounds which has NOT come off yet but at least I stopped gaining. Even though I used to tell myself that by not smoking a pack a day, it was ok.... it is not!
I no longer smell like smoke nor do my clothes. I no longer panic and wonder where my smokes are when the phone rings. I no longer feel like an outcast with people that don't smoke as I am now one of them. I am the first to ask for the nonsmoking section of a restaurant. And the biggest pride of all is that I can now tell my grandchildren about the dangers of smoking and not feel like a hypocrite.
If I can do this, you can do this. The pride and feeling of accomplishment make each day a happy day and I will continue to mark the calendar until I reach one year and will never forget the date I became smoke free.
~Paula H.~



