Linda's Quit Story

In December, 1975, a few months after I turned 15, I was at a youth group convention at a hotel in Jacksonville, Florida. Some of us girls went into the girl's bathroom and that is where I had my very first cigarette. I remember it tasted absolutely disgusting. I coughed, I choked, but I smoked the whole thing. I was hooked.

I was a child of a smoker and remember my mother smoking cigarettes and how they stunk. You would think that I would have remembered that when I took that first drag. Apparently I didn't. That first cigarette, even though it tasted horrible, got me addicted to something that I would abuse for the next 27 years.

My mother always told me to be honest with her, and that if I ever started smoking to do it in front of her. Since she and I were very close, I shared with her that I started smoking. I'm sure she wasn't too happy, but at least I was truthful. We smoked the same brand, Winston, and I remember the price of a carton being $4.00 at the time. That was expensive almost 29 years ago!

I was the only one of my friends to smoke. Some of them would come with me to the smoking area at the high school(which they no longer have, thank goodness) so we could visit and I could get my nicotine fix. None of my friend's parents knew I smoked except for one. I don't know why I hid it; maybe because I was embarrassed for them to know I had a dreadful habit.

As the years went by, I smoked more and more. At a doctor's appointment my mother had, her doctor told her she should quit smoking. She got the pack of cigarettes from her purse and literally threw them at him. She quit right then and there, and stayed quit until the day she died. What a gal! I quit with her, but it lasted for only 6 months. I asked a friend of mine for a smoke and she gave it to me. That was it. I was hooked again. I did not have the heart to tell my mother I was smoking again, but I figured she knew. How couldn't she with that awful smell cigarettes emit?

In 1987, the year I turned 27, my favorite aunt was diagnosed with lung cancer. It really didn't click in my mind about smoking and cancer. I guess I was hiding the truth from myself. She had a horrible, painful death and died in late March of that year. I kept on smoking.

August 7, 1990 my mother passed away. I was still smoking and started to smoke more and more after her death. I don't think I cared.

Fast forward to mid 1998. One of my good friends from work was diagnosed with lung cancer, caused by smoking. She died peacefully at home on November 11, 1998. I lost a wonderful friend who left behind a 16 year old daughter. I still smoked.

Fast forward to late 2002. I was having a hard time breathing and was wheezing pretty badly even at rest. I had the worst smoker's cough imaginable and was not feeling so well. I went to the doctor on October 1, 2002, and she was concerned about my breathing. She gave me some meds and told me to come back in 2 weeks.

On October 2, 2002, while on a smoke break with a co-worker who quit 5 years before (she was just hanging out with me), I told her that it hurt to smoke. The smoke would burn my throat and lungs and I couldn't breathe - I had bad shortness of breath. She told me it was time (she never told me to quit). Right then and there, at 10:00 in the morning, I decided to quit. I gave my last 2 packs of cigarettes to my then smoking buddy and made the best decision of my life.

I went back to the doctor 2 weeks later and told her that I quit smoking. During those 2 weeks, my breathing got so much better and so did the coughing. I was coughing up really gross stuff, but it was because my lungs were finally healing.

I had some pretty bad times with withdrawals, but three things kept me from failing: determination, commitment, and willpower. They are my 3 best friends in the world, and they have kept me from slipping. It's just amazing that I did quit because I live with a smoker. But my 3 friends were there for me as they are now and keep me in line.

For those of you who are new to quitting, please don't give up. Just keep hanging in there because once the bad spots in quitting lessen, your life will be seen through different eyes. Trust me. :)

Linda (LindaBF19)

More from Linda:
Linda's One Year Milestone
Linda's Three Year Milestone
Linda's Four Year Milestone